Author Archive
Upspeak is Not Speaking Up
Upspeak is NOT Speaking Up Upspeak ( Uptalk) had its beginning in the era of the Valley Girl in California. It has since spread its tentacles across the years to wrap around the speaking habits of both women and men of all ages. Why is this phenomenon significant? Because Upspeakers unknowingly compromise the quality of the competent, knowledgeable leadership image that they want to project.Columnist Hank Davis writes, in The Uptalk Epidemic,
“It’s a nasty habit. It is the very opposite of confidence or assertiveness. It’s gotten all out of control. These days, even statements about which there should be no question or doubt are presented in this tentative, timid and deferential manner.”
When statements and assertions sound like questions, your credibility and competence can be doubted. When you give advice or offer an educated assessment of a set of facts, the perception of your expertise gets chipped away when you sound like you are asking a question. Would you want to be represented by or rely on the advice someone who sounds unsure and tentative? Tentative is the dark side of Confident. Your voice should reflect everything you want your listener to believe about you. You have substance. You are in control. You are knowledgeable. You have the answer….not that you are unsure of yourself and are seeking validation.
In less than a second, the time it takes to say “hello,” we make a snap judgment about someone’s personality, says Jody Kreiman, a UCLA researcher who studies how we perceive voice. On hearing just a brief utterance, we decide whether to approach the person or to avoid them. I would add that in that same split second, we decide if that person has “gravitas” and has the expertise to solve our problem, address our concerns, represent our interests.
I’ve personally witnessed Upspeak at the highest levels of Fortune 100 companies, and I’ve heard it used as a reason to deny a promotion or discredit an idea. A wise career move is to take the time to analyze your own speaking patterns and snuff out Upspeak. Record yourself in a variety of speaking situations and LISTEN objectively. Become your own audience. Elicit feedback from a trusted friend or colleague. To be perceived as a leader and person of substance, you must not only LOOK like a leader with a polished physical image, you must also SOUND like a leader with a polished Vocal Image.
Behaviors and Business Etiquette to discuss with Accent Students in the Workplace
One thing that comes to mind is not letting a speaker know that you are listening. We do this with words, sounds, and phrases like ah huh, yeah, I know what mean, of course, right, oh definitely, for sure, I hear you, absolutely.This is something one of my clients asked me to talk about with his employees: let people know you are listening.
And on the phone, when a customer stops talking, the customer usually expects you to, then, say something. Silence, or “dead air” is unsettling. It makes one wonder if anyone is listening. A direct question is not the only way we indicate that we now expect the listener to say something. Not observing turn-taking cues could go on the list.
1) Not observing turn-taking cues – allowing there to be silence or “dead air”
2) Not acknowledging that one is listening
3) Saying “yes” when one really means “I don’t know” or “I’m not sure”.
4) Unknowingly taking a tone that sounds to direct and bold
5) Seeming impersonal or unfriendly when one might really be shy and not know what to say
6) Only saying what is necessary and getting straight to the matter at hand without any of the usual small talk – seeming to be in too much of a hurry to move on – impersonal(Another consultant made note of this when speaking of a client we both have.)